Losing g heat between the sheets? Take a quick refresher course to enjoy sex better and boost your love life
Just like sex isn’t a one man show, good sex isn’t just about achieving the end game. For it to be magic, both partners need to step up their act and rise to the occasion. But with differing preferences, abilities and responses, getting it right each time can be a little overwhelming. To help spice up the mundane and overhaul the awkward, here’s a simple checklist.
Use fantasies
You’ve heard this before, but it’s a fact — The brain is THE most powerful sex organ. Fantasies allow us to free up sexual habits and try out new things. Shared fantasies can liven up a sexual relationship to add new excitement and rekindle arousal. The most pleasurable sexual fantasies are those that centre around ideals that are unobtainable in ‘real’ life.
When in the act, it’s essential for partners to talk to each other about what they feel. It isn’t a silent film. Tell each other what you’d like to do so your bodies adjust and pleasure each other. Talk, especially dirty, can be very erotic during sex.
Partner preferences
A majority of men don’t seem to understand that during foreplay, progress from kissing and cuddling to caressing isn’t only extremely exciting and pleasurable for a woman, but is essential for her arousal. Without it, sexual pleasure and satisfaction are a long way off. Being considerate here will bring you brownie points.
Different strokes
Conventional wisdom tells us that porn is not only damaging to our psyches, but also destructive to relationships.
But who says porn is so damaging to monogamous unions. Before we consign it to the relationship deal breaker dustbin, perhaps we should re-examine our prejudices about porn to see if it’s really as bad as everyone says it is.
Salon columnist Tracy Clark-Flory recently tackled this very subject in ‘Does porn hurt relationships?’
Clark-Flory cites a highly suspect survey conducted by the folks at Cosmopolitan, who seem to be taking a break from offering silly sex tips, that has determined that watching porn ruins sex because it destroys women’s sexual self-confidence.
The fact is- we cannot ignore pornography even if we occasionally find it distasteful.
According to Gizmodo, 25 per cent of all search engine requests are pornography related. That’s 68 million searches a day and a lot of libidinous viewing.
But despite the dubious claims made by the pages of Cosmo, watching porn doesn’t have to ruin your confidence and sex life.
Under the right circumstances and in the proper frame of mind, watching porn together can actually do wonders for your sex life.
“Porn can actually help foster emotional and sexual intimacy,” the Huffington Post quoted Colorado psychologist David Schnarch, author of ‘Resurrecting Sex: Solving Sexual Problems and Revolutionizing Your Relationship’ as saying.
Fantasy is part of a healthy sex life, and porn adds to the repository of sexy scenarios in our heads.
It can also inspire couples to experiment more in the bedroom (or outside of it if that’s where their fantasies lead them).
Porn is a shared experience. Any time a couple can share a hobby, or even better, a sexual experience, they are investing in the longevity of their relationship.
Going solo with porn is fine, but why not include your partner. Just make sure the kids are out of earshot before proceeding.
It’s an easy way to learn about your partner’s fantasies. Some people are very shy or ashamed about sharing their sexual fantasies with their partners.
Others don’t even know what really turns them on, much less what gets their spouses’ engines revved.
Thanks to the Internet, there’s a veritable smorgasbord of video clips with professionals and amateurs playing out any and every possible sexual act.
Watching porn can speed up foreplay.readmorehttp://theuncagedsoullifestlye.blogspot.com/2014/09/alvin-and-vivian-uncaged-sex-story-isnt.html
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